1. |
~12
00:31
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Last Night I took about a dozen White Claws to the face / and stumbled around my parents’ living in a drunken malaise / and I’m still working at a coffee shop just at a different place / and I’m just dying to not be dying anymore
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2. |
Endgames
02:54
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I’m sitting staring out at the sidewalk / on a corner in west Philadelphia / on a stranger’s stoop drinking vanilla vodka with Dr. Pepper from the bottle
Me and Bair are going to see The Avengers / fight some incredible alien threat / it’s just another pulpy vignette but I could use an hour or three where I can forget
And there’s something awfully human about all of that / telling the same stories again / over and over, generation and regeneration as in ritual
And if I ever said that they make too many sequels / you should know that I’m a hypocrite / so let’s greenlight another remake of that summer I bailed on a girl and got drunk over it
Let’s get drunk over it / let’s get drunk over it / let’s get drunk over it
And I said “Bair I don’t know how to explain it” / “I just started to feel claustrophobic” / “like the ending was coming but I kinda ignored it ‘cause I didn’t want it to be true”
“And maybe she and I were too similar” / “so when things starting going awry” / “we clung to each other for a cold kind of comfort and I just grew number without saying why”
And as we show up to get our tickets / well above the legal limit / I think to myself that my life isn’t over, it’s just at the start of a different phase
And the promise of a new beginning / can feel awfully intoxicating / and if just for a second I feel this obsession with learning a lesson and changing my ways
So we’ll see how that goes / so we’ll see how that goes / I’ll let you know
How that goes / we’ll see how that goes / I’ll let you know
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3. |
Imperfect
03:43
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I kept a notebook when I was probably six / I drew knights and cowboys, with arms and legs like sticks / If one line was out of place, I’d black out the entire page / if it wasn’t perfect, I threw it straight away / it wasn’t perfect, so I threw it all away
I met a girl when I was twenty-two / she made me laugh and saw the world the way I do / and I thought till our dying day we’d see the world by car and train / but it wasn’t perfect, so I threw it straight away / it wasn’t perfect, so I threw it all away
Now I’m drunk inside the Asbury hotel / in the bathroom taking selfies, till I find one that suits me well / and after a couple tries / I delete the whole damn lot / wondering what all those pretty people / have got that I haven’t got / and the band is playing
Now I don’t know which way to turn at 24 / I’ve written songs, so I guess I’ll write a couple more / in the hopes that I can gain some kind of order in my brain / but if they’re not perfect, I’ll throw them all away / this song’s not perfect / so I’ll probably throw it away /
Now I’m drunk inside the Asbury hotel / arguing online about the latest Star Wars film / it had some good ideas but didn’t see them to fruition / so I guess me and that goddamn movie have got something in common after all / and the band is playing
And they’re singing imperfectly
In imperfect harmony
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4. |
The God Thing
03:21
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She said, “as for the God thing, I’m not really sure” / “there’s a million explanations for why he opened that door” / “and smiled back at me like he’d never smiled before” / “and said, ‘darling why don’t we take a walk’”
She said, “as for the love thing, I can’t really tell” / “we were two scheming prisoners sharing a cell” / “saying ‘we’ll hop that fence and find a better place to dwell” / “but maybe it was always just talk”
There’s god in the airwaves / and in the books that we read / and even us heathens / feel the crippling need / to feel like there’s something / that has power in our lives / so as for the god thing / I really don’t mind
He said, “as for this death thing, I don’t know what to say” / “I just woke up and I couldn’t call him one day” / “I still have his number and I can still see his face” / “but there’s a hole in the place where he stood”
He said, “as for the heaven thing, I’m coming around” / “for most of my life I was brimming with doubt” / “but when his favorite song plays it’s like he’s smiling down” / “so if there’s no clouds or harps then I’m good” /
‘Cause there’s god in our memories / and in the home team / it’s not something that we want / it’s just something we need / to feel like there’s someone / that’s got all our backs / so as for the God thing / I don’t think it’s that bad
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5. |
My Life on TV
02:36
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Rico says I should get back on Tinder / but I’m doubtful I can find a single decent picture /
where I’m not playing with my band / or sitting hand-in-anxious-hand with the girl I would project on all those unsuspecting women
I don’t think that I can stand to be the Jim to all their Pams / in a dozen interactions that last for minutes before fizzling
And getting drunk and swiping left / feels like ten thousand little deaths by a writer killing characters whose plots were just beginning
So listen here / I’m going home / and drinking Yuengling by the case while watching Mad Men all alone / ‘cause it’s a show she wouldn’t like much anyway / anyway
Chris Dubrow says my self-sabotage is lazy / so caught up on the ending that I bail quick and get out safely
Like pulling books off of the shelves / reading the last page and saying “oh well, / that’s not what I want so I’ll leave the store and spend no money”
But tramps like me, I was born to run / not towards a better place but from everything and everyone / and it’s one thing to feel that way at the start / but that plot is wearing thin and everybody loves a good redemption arc
So listen here / if my life was on TV / 13 episodes of a sad boy on Twitter in his PJs / that’s a show I wouldn’t like much anyway / so I’m gonna try to write a better script each day / till I’m canceled or till I win all of the Emmys /
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